The Missing Pronoun Gap

One telltale sign of a novice writer is when they demonstrate confusion over the most simple of grammatical rules – the agreement of pronoun and antecedent.

What could be simpler? A wordsmith of any experience shouldn’t stumble when they are called upon to ensure all pronouns agree in number, gender and case to the preceding noun to which they refer.

What’s that, you say? Something’s amiss?

In fact, there is. In the previous paragraphs, I deliberately have hoisted myself with my own petard.

More precisely, I’ve been having a bit of what passes for grammatical fun to illustrate an example of English usage that I’ll call “The Missing Pronoun Gap.”

Old-school grammarians will have winched twice in reading the first three sentences of this post. In two of those sentences, I used the plural they to refer to the singular writer and wordsmith, a clear violation of the general rule. Or is it?

What to do?

Orthodoxy would argue that the corrective move is replace the errant they with a singular he or she. But which one? The writer in question could be either male or female. Or there could be a compelling reason to cloak the gender of said writer.

 Since English doesn’t have a singular third-person pronoun that can refer to either gender, what’s the responsible writer to do?

Once upon a time, the proscriptive course would have been to use he in cases where gender is not stipulated. Not anymore. Modern sensibilities – tempered and forged by the women’s movement and a growing general enlightenment – forbid it.

“That this practice has come under increasing attack has caused the single most difficult problem in the realm of sexist language,” says Bryan Garner in his Garner’s Modern American Usage. “Other snarls are far more readily solvable.”

Use of they or their as singular pronouns often come in sentences with such indefinite pronouns as someone, everyone or anyone. All are commonly mistaken as plural constructions.

For example:

Everyone knows how to mow their own grass, but anyone with a lick of sense will pay to have it done.

Everyone is singular, but many (most?) folks believe it’s plural so the use of their sounds correct.  The problem is everyone doesn’t specify gender. In fact, it literally means all of us: women and men. So it should be his. Or her. But which one?

Keep reading as I try to disperse the fog a bit.

The dilemma

Traditional grammarians, even as they express their distaste for the use of they as singular pronouns, acknowledge the dilemma.

“Our system of personal pronouns – or, to be more accurate, a gap in the system – is the source of a great deal of the sexism in our language,” admit Martha Kolln and Robert Funk in their Understanding English Grammar.

In spoken English, the problem already has been resolved by the common use of they, their or them as substitutes for the missing third-person, non-gender pronoun.

For example:

Teaching a child their ABCs is essential if they are to succeed in kindergarten.

The writer who ignores grammar will find they don’t have many readers.

Garner argues that the language should yield to the inevitable.

 “Speakers of American English resist this development more than speakers of British English, in which the indeterminate they is already more or less standard,” he says. “That it sets many literate Americans’ teeth on edge is an unfortunate obstacle to what promises to be the ultimate solution to the problem.”

Random House copy chief Benjamin Dreyer demurs, describing himself as “too old a dog to embrace” they as a singular pronoun. But he notes that “in speech most of us use the singular ‘they’ relentlessly and without a second thought.”

Hardliners, of course, consider the practice as yet another sign of civilization’s slide into anarchy and madness.

“In colloquial usage the inconvenience of having no common-sex personal pronoun in the singular has proved stronger than respect for the grammarians,” bemoaned the great Henry W. Fowler in his landmark A Dictionary of Modern English Usage.

Examine the possibilities

Theodore Bernstein, another traditionalist, grudgingly admitted that the use of they in such cases “is common enough in spontaneous, casual speech, and even occurs occasionally in the work of reputable writers.

“Yet,” he adds, and you can imagine him raising his index finger emphatically, “the writer of craftsmanship and taste” – dramatic pause – “will reject the grammatical inconsistency of the combination of a singular noun and a plural pronoun. He will examine the possibilities available.”

I count myself among the grammatical pragmatists who believe that the use of they as a singular pronoun is an imperfect, but acceptable, option in sentences where the gender of the preceding noun isn’t identified.

Most often, however, I find myself looking for a way, as Garner puts it, “to write around the problem.” In my mind, it’s better to spend more time building a better sentence than to be considered by some of my readers as a careless, slovenly writer.

Some alternatives

Perhaps like me you seek alternatives to the “anything goes” landscape in which the singular they thrives. If so, here are some options listed from worst to better.

n  Alternate the use of he and she throughout the article or passage. This deranged attempt at fairness – or at least parity – is confusing and disorienting to readers. Avoid it as you would a pit bull who just gnawed its way out of the backyard.

n  Try to please everyone. Use the phrase he or she, his or her to refer back to a non-gender-specific singular noun.

For example:

It’s not hard to imagine a teacher who hates his or her students but loves having summers off.

Who could blame a manager, when faced with downsizing his or her department, for wanting to run away and join the circus?

Although perfectly acceptable from a grammatical or political point of view, this usage amounts to writerly cowardice of the worse sort. It’s a clunky alternative that interrupts the flow and rhythm of the sentence and labels you a writer without conviction and spirit. You’ll hate yourself if you resort to it.

Exponentially worse is the typographical atrocity s/he or h/she. Mercifully, I’ve never actually seen this literary construction used, but a couple of reference books I consulted present it as a possible alternative. I’ve since burned them. (Kidding!)

n  Embrace the past and damn the torpedoes! Use he or him as non-gender singular third-person stand ins. After all, mankind is used widely to refer to all of us, male and female, although humankind is coming on strong. You’ll delight the traditionalists, who see themselves as the lone Gandalf, standing staff in hand and roaring, “You shall not pass!” Don’t be shocked, however, if you infuriate everyone else – and not just women – who will accuse you of being a lazy Neanderthal. Not me, you understand, just all of them.

n  Make the preceding noun plural. This is easily done, in most cases with little or no fuss. You then can employ the useful they or them, and no one can dare complain.

n  Rewrite the damned sentence! This, of course, is by far the best option. Yes, it requires more work, but sometimes the best approach to a problem is to avoid it altogether. And when you do, you discover the result often is better than the original.

While the venerable AP Stylebook says use of they/their/them as singular and/or nongender pronouns is acceptable, it clearly views the usage with distaste.

“Rewording usually is possible and always is preferable,” AP says. “Clarity is a top priority; gender-neutral use of a singular they is unfamiliar to many readers.”

Bernstein concurs, “The solution here is to recognize the imperfection of language and modify the wording.”

Try these modifications, which cause little or no disruption to the original sentence.

·       Delete the pronoun completely.

Original: The professor rushed out of the classroom as soon as confirmation of the $25 million inheritance was delivered to him by singing telegram.

Revised: The professor rushed out of the classroom as soon as confirmation of the $5 million NIH grant was delivered by singing telegram.

·       Change the pronoun to a or the.

Original: The professor rushed out of the classroom as soon as confirmation of his $5 million NIH grant was delivered by singing telegram.

Revised: The professor rushed out of the classroom as soon as confirmation of the $5 million NIH grant was delivered by singing telegram.

·       When the noun is included in an introductory prepositional phrase starting with “if,” rewrite the sentence using the relative pronoun who.

Original:  If a firefighter is afraid of fire, perhaps he should choose another line of work.

Revised: Perhaps a firefighter who is afraid of fire should choose another line of work.

·       Repeat the noun instead of using a pronoun, but only if there are enough words separating the two to avoid repetitiveness. 

Original: A writer must know the basics of grammar before embarking on any major writing project. If he doesn’t, the project will be compromised.

Revised: A writer must know the basics of grammar before embarking on any major writing project. If the writer doesn’t, the project will be compromised.

Never: A writer must know the basics of grammar before the writer embarks on any major project. (Beep, beep! Proximity alert!)

Merriam-Webster’s Dictionary of English Usage is sanguine about the rising popularity of they as a single pronoun, pointing out that the problem is not a 20^th century development.

“Although the lack of a common-gender third person pronoun has received much attention in recent years from those concerned with women’s issues, the problem, as felt by writers, is much older; the plural pronouns have been pressed into use to supply the missing form since Middle English,” it says.

 Merriam-Webster also helpfully reminds us that “the English pronoun system is not fixed.” For instance, thou, thee and ye all have been supplanted by the ubiquitous you.

 “They, their, them have been used continuously in singular reference for about six centuries, and have been disparaged in such use for about two centuries,” it says. “Now the influence of social forces is making their use even more attractive.”

So the general consensus is that the use of they will grow ever more accepted as a singular alternative to the chauvinist he when referring to preceding singular nouns of undetermined gender.

The ever-practical Dreyer says that day already has arrived.

“The singular ‘they’ is not the wave of the future; it’s the wave of the present,” he says.

A final thought

Before we leave the subject of pronouns and gender, let’s touch on the issue of how to deal with what AP calls “gender-nonconforming individuals” – that is, those who do not fit into the traditional view of two genders.

Such individuals could be transgender (those whose gender identity does not match the sex or gender they were identified as having at birth), intersex (those with genitalia, chromosomes or reproductive organs that don’t fit typical definitions for males or females at birth), nonbinary (those whose gender identity is something other than strictly male or female) or something else.

How should the responsible writer deal with the relatively rare occasions when such concerns arise?

The answer isn’t to stick their heads in the sand and hope the whole thing goes away. Because it won’t. In fact, I suspect it will become ever more common as time goes by.

The sensible course is to determine, when feasible, the pronoun preference of the people you’re writing about and follow it. In the rarest of instances, you may encounter folks who don’t want to be identified by gender-specific pronouns at all. In those cases, you can rely on some of the suggestions offered above.

I’m less sanguine about the use of alternative pronouns invented for those people who do not identify as either male or female. One of the more common constructs is ze/zir, but there are many others and the number is growing. At some point, presumably, there will be an attempt to settle on one system for universal adoption.

I dislike these alternatives, not out of any political or grammatical convictions, but for the practical reason that most readers aren’t familiar with them. Our job is provide clarity, not spew confusion so we should find a way to write around the problem.

If you can’t, or if your subjects insist on their use, then you have no choice but to include an explanation of what you’re doing, despite its clunky and disruptive impact.

The lesson here? Language usage evolves, as does the social and cultural environment in which it exists. As writers, we have no choice but to evolve with it.